1. „I might join you later“ – Meaning: I’m not leaving the house today unless it’s on fire.
2. „Excuse me, sorry, is anyone sitting here?“ – Translation: You have three seconds to move your bag before I end you.
3. „Not to worry“ – Translation: I will never forget this.
4. Saying sorry as a way of introducing yourself.
5. „Bit wet out there“ – You’re going to need a snorkel because it’s absolutely pissing it down.
6. Ending an email with „Thanks“ as a warning that you’re perilously close to losing your temper.
7. „Right then, I suppose I really should start thinking about possibly making a move“
Translation: „Bye“.
8. „It’s fine“ – Meaning: It really could not possibly get any worse, but no doubt it will do.
9. „Perfect“ – Translation: Well that’s that ruined then.
10. „A bit of a pickle“ – Translation: A catastrophically bad situation with potentially fatal consequences.
11. „Not too bad, actually“ – Translation: I’m probably the happiest I’ve ever been.
12. „Honestly, it doesn’t matter“ – Meaning: Nothing has ever mattered more than this.
13. „You’ve caught the sun“ – Translation: You look like you’ve been swimming in a volcano.
14. „That’s certainly one way of looking at it“
Translation: That’s certainly the wrong way of looking at it
15. Saying „I have the 5p if it helps?“ and never being quite sure if it helps.
